#newmomproblems and Why I Love Them

4 months! Man, does time fly. Silas is growing, smiling, laughing, cooing, reaching, and responding more and more each day. Just look at this stud!

Seriously, Mom? More pictures?

For real though, he's freaking adorable.

He's super fun. Of course, this fun is not without early early mornings, tons of laundry, messy floors as I attempt to nurse my child and make breakfast at the same time, and other #newmomproblems. (You may have seen me use this hash tag on Twitter and/or Facebook. If not, you're sure to see it in the near future. ;))

I have had quite a few new mom problems since this crazy journey called motherhood began 4 months ago. There was my emotional breakdown in the doctor's office during Silas's two-month shots, the 15 minutes I spent walking around the outside of Briarwood every Wednesday for a month trying to find a stroller friendly entrance near the nursery (am I crazy or should there be way more ramps outside that place?), the massive load of laundry I dyed a not-so-subtle pink, and most recently the "newborn size" minion hat I purchased that makes Silas look like he's being eaten alive by Minion Dave. These are just a sampling.

Yeah... *face palm*

Contrary to what one might think, the fun has not come despite my new mom problems but in many cases, because of them. I was reflecting today on some of the things these problems (and other struggles that come along with being a parent in general) have taught me and decided a concrete, albeit condensed, list was in order.

I. #newmomproblems have taught me to stop being so dang anal about everything. You may chuckle, but it's a decently well known fact (my husband can verify if you have doubts) that I'm a Type A, IN(/S)TJ, nit picky control freak person. Quite frankly, it's not the most motherhood-friendly personality. Even so, over the past few months I've learned to embrace the unexpected, the spontaneous, the messy. I don't know when Silas will wake up each morning or what mood he'll be in that day. I can't control how many outfits he spits up on in a 24 hour period or when he will decide to pee all over me.... and the changing table... and himself during a routine diaper change. The funny thing is that I'm not just dealing with it, I'm enjoying it. I'm learning to loosen up, to give over the small details as well as the big ones to the Lord. He controls each and every minute and has a purpose for each and every "incident." Enjoying the ride is more than just fun - it's freedom.

II. #newmomproblems have given me some of the best memories to date. Seriously, they have! I can't wait to tell Silas about the time his entire wardrobe (well, a large portion of it at least) could have been donated to a little girl...or how many times he's thrown up on both his father and me, ruining what could have been a perfectly email-worthy video to the grandparents. I love sharing these moments with other new moms and hearing there own stories, too. In retrospect, they really are funny, and I know each of us will look back on them fondly, no matter what our feelings were at the time. Your baby is only a baby once, and you have to make the most of those moments before they're just memories. But even then - perhaps especially then - those stories make us smile.

III. #newmomproblems have shown me the gospel in new and refreshing ways. I've mentioned before how much actually having a son intensifies the meaning of the gospel for me. The idea of God giving His only son for my sin is far more tangible when I think about giving my own son up for...well, anything. But motherhood has taught me even more than that. I get a daily exercise in living in light of the gospel in what many would call "the mundane." I am learning not just to trust God when making life-altering decisions or facing some sort of crisis but also when I stub my toe on yet another plastic, noise-making toy or burn the toast because I'm redoing a swaddle for the umpteenth time. Gospel is not just a trump word that we use to make things seem holier than they are. It's truth, and it changes us from the inside out- not just on the dangerous mission field of the unreached Bugis people but also in the colorful new nursery of our not-yet-converted babies who need Jesus just as much as anyone.

At the end of the day, it's these mini-adventures that make my calling as a mom so exciting. I think C.S. Lewis sums it up well in this quote on life's interruptions:

“The great thing, if one can, is to stop regarding all the unpleasant things as interruptions of one’s ‘own’, or ‘real’ life. The truth is of course that what one calls the interruptions are precisely one’s real life – the life God is sending one day by day: what one calls one’s ‘real life’ is a phantom of one’s own imagination.”

Well put, sir. I couldn't agree more.